Jan 29, 2019
You guys, we are back with our
first guest of the year! I’m so thrilled to be sharing this
conversation I had with Cheryl Scruggs— she is the mother of Lauren
Scruggs Kennedy (who we had on the podcast in episode 002- click
here to listen!) who is a dear
friend of mine. Cheryl and her husband have a nonprofit called Hope
for Marriages where they support couples in reconciling their
marriages and they also co-wrote “I Do Again.”
Cheryl + Jeff: The
Way They Met
" style="background-color: transparent; color: #222222;
font-family: -webkit-standard; font-size: 18px; font-style: normal;
font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal;
margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 36px; margin-top: 0px; orphans: 2;
text-align: left; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px;
text-transform: none; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; white-space:
normal; word-spacing: 0px;">• Cheryl
and her husband, Jeff, have such a beautiful story that genuinely
makes me cry.
• In
a world that says to bail on something the second it becomes
uncomfortable, they have chosen a countercultural response in their
marriage.
• Cheryl
was working as a cocktail waitress to put herself through college
when Jeff walked in. They talked a bit and he asked her out on a
date.
• She
was already engaged at this time, but deep in her heart knew that
she would not end up marrying the man to whom she was
engaged.
• When
Jeff returned the next week, she agreed to go on a date with him.
After a year, they became engaged.
Chasing
Happy
• Two
years in to their marriage, she began to feel
lonely. “I
thought there was something wrong with me for feeling that way
because it looked like we had the perfect life.”
• She
opens up about her IVF treatments that led her to have her two twin
girls who are now 30 years old. She thought maybe they had been the
missing link.
• One
day, she was on a sales trip and she met a man that she would
eventually have an affair with. “I’m
not proud of any of this, but this is our story.”
• When
she and Jeff moved from Los Angeles to Dallas, she found herself
missing the man she had been having the affair
with.
• They
would have phone calls—connecting heart to heart. Ultimately,
Cheryl filed for divorce from Jeff.
A Second
Chance At Love
• Looking
back, she realizes that Jesus was the missing piece in her
marriage.
• “I
think God had a different plan and we weren’t following
it.”
• Two
months after their divorce, Cheryl really dove into her
faith.
• “By
the end of the year 1992, I realized that, ‘oh my gosh, I feel like
God is wanting us to pursue reconciliation.’”
• Jeff
didn’t think that was going to happen, so they continued to
co-parent from separate homes.
• “The
more I read about biblical marriage, I
realized if we could just work on this, we could have a marriage
honoring God, being what God wanted us to be rather than who we
were.”
• Five
years after their divorce, they began to spend more time together
as a family. And soon after, Jeff began asking Cheryl out on dates.
Soon after, they remarried.
• Out
of this experience, their nonprofit Hope for Marriages was
born.
All In Commitment
• “You
yourself have to understand who you are and who God has made
you.”
• Cheryl
recognizes that our pasts always have an effect on our
relationships, but if we are aware of them, we can have more
control over how they affect us.
• “Happiness
is very fleeting. What the Lord wants for us is deep joy. You can
be going through trials and still have deep joy.”
Keep up with
Cheryl at @cherylscruggs on
Instagram, Thrivingbeyondbelief.com, on Facebook
at Cheryl
Scruggs. Here’s
where you can get her book “I Do Again.”
Hey, single
ladies— are you frustrated by the dating world? This episode is
brought to you by my free guide called“6 Tips to Activate Your
Dating Life with Intention and Clarity.” These resources helped
propel me from sitting on the couch to out on a date. Head over to
Bit.ly/trwdating to
check it out! With you on the journey.
XO,
Kat
