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The Refined Collective Podcast

May 23, 2019

Next up in the Dude’s Podcast Series is: Jarod Nickerson. If you missed the last episode, be sure + check out my interview with Jamal Miller:  The #1 Reason He Isn’t Asking You Out (pssst…it’s not what you think).


Let’s jump in! Jarod was full of insight, and mic drop moments as we navigated through your top questions on men, singleness, and relationships:


  1. Do guys know when a girl has a crush on them?
  • Every guy is different, but Jarod mentions that it is possible to be unaware when a girl has a crush. 


  1. Do guys develop attraction over time or does it have to be there from the get-go?
  • A lot of the time, attraction will be there from the start, but it’s possible for the attraction to develop as they get to know a girl.
  • “If someone puts you in the friendzone, don’t try to get out of it—move on.”


  1. Which do you value more: respect or love?
  • Love and respect go hand in hand—it’s pretty impossible to not respect someone you love.


  1. How do I know if he likes me?
  • There are a lot of things to consider: Are they aware of themselves? Are they playing it cool because they’re worried about it going wrong?


  1. Is it true that if he’s interested, he’ll pursue/do whatever it takes to make it happen? 
  • A guy will pursue and do whatever it takes to make it happen until it’s clear she does not want to pursue anything. 


  1. Do you think guys + girls can be just friends?  
  • Jarod believes it is possible but knows there can be confusion for some friendships. It all comes down to being transparent and honest.



  1. How can I let him know I’m interested in more than just friends w/o being too aggressive/forward?
  • Confidence is sexy and honesty is important. Let it out, but don’t hang on it.
  • “If someone can’t handle you being real and honest with them, then they’re probably not someone who is always going to be calling you up and out for the rest of your life.”


  1. Would you date a woman that doesn’t share your worldview/faith?  
  • Jarod says no, in short. He is Christian and would need someone who shares his worldview.


  1. Are you intimidated by a woman w a successful career?
  • He wants the answer to be no, but the honest answer is “probably.”
  • The time when it can feel most intimidating is at the start of a relationship, but he would definitely still ask her out.


  1. 10.What’s something that women do that feels emasculating?
  • Distrust and not supporting his future would be devastating.
  • “Everything magical lies outside of your comfort zone.”


  1. 11.What’s something a woman can do to honor you/makes you feel like a man?
  • Belief—everyone loves to have someone believe in them.
  • Luke Stafford— @itslukestafford (he’s single, ladies!) is a friend who calls him out and he is grateful for it.


  1. 12.What are you looking for in a relationship/partner?
  • “I’m looking for someone who is going to challenge me, push me, and believe in me. I don’t want just a cheerleader.”


  1. 13.Why do you think a lot of guys don’t want to date within their own community i.e. church?
  • He notes the challenges that arise when there is close proximity in this way. If it doesn’t work out—a guy doesn’t want that ‘Scarlett letter.’
  • Don’t let fear be motivating any of your decisions in relationships.


  1. 14.Where are all the single godly men—do you think there are more single than women, or does it just seem like that?
  • “Put your eyes on what has been set before and it will be one of those moments of synchronicity.”
  • The question is rooted in fear.
  • “Ask the Lord to quiet your mind and ask Him to speak.”


Thank you so much for listening to the podcast and being part of this community! If you enjoy listening, I want to invite you to subscribe to us on iTunes and rate and review us. Search “The Refined Collective” on the purple podcast app on your phone. Share your review on IG stories + tag us so we can show you some love!


Hey, single ladies— are you frustrated by the dating world? This episode is brought to you by my free guide called “6 Tips to Activate Your Dating Life with Intention and Clarity.” These resources helped propel me from sitting on the couch to out on a date. Head over to check it out! With you on the journey.