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The Refined Collective Podcast

Feb 19, 2019

Jessica Shakir is a motivational speaker, celebrity hair and makeup artist, and beauty expert. Her passion is to help you use your voice to unveil truth and beauty. She is a dear friend of mine and we recently got to get together at my apartment to have some fun photoshoots and sit down and chat for the podcast. We talk about waiting for marriage, waiting for love, and praying to God.

Praying for Others

  • Jessica and I are both prayer warriors, praying for others, praying for celebrities.
  • She reflects on her experience working with Eminem, who was thoughtful and engaging the entire time they worked together.
  • “Lord, anoint the works of my hands. Help me to be a light, help me to reflect your love, even without having to say anything about the Bible or Jesus.”
  • As she was praying this before walking into her job, she remembered that she had been praying for Eminem for five years before the job. Her friend had asked her to.
  • “I wasn’t in the habit of praying for people I didn’t know.”
  • She began to pray for him every time she heard his music, praying that God would send the right people into his life to point him to Heaven.
  • “God used me to answer my own prayer.”
  • She remembers at the end of the job telling him “God bless you.” He was taken aback. He thanked her sincerely and said, “God bless you, too.”

Prayer + Love

  • She reflects on her wedding day and her vows to her husband, “It was an honor to wait for you, Vincent.”
  • “In that moment, I thought, “Dang, I wish I could delete all the times I compromised… I wish I could delete all the times I didn’t trust God more.”
  • She talks about her experience as a woman who waited to have sex until she was married at 36 years old. “It was powerfully intimate and wildly free.”
  • Though she was a virgin on her wedding day, she still experienced shame.
  • “My biggest regret is not trusting God more.”
  • She and her husband decided to not even share a single kiss until they were engaged. “It made every touch so magical and meaningful.”
  • They met at a Super Bowl party and once she found out he loves Jesus, she started crushing hard.
  • “I knew he would be in my life forever and somehow he would change it.” Seven months later, they were engaged.

A Season of Waiting

  • She recognizes that the time of waiting can be the perfect time to group in your faith.
  • “The only reason I can be this happily engaged is because first I was happily single.”
  • She recognizes all of the personal growth that she experienced during her waiting and how it all led her to where she is now.
  • “Every chance I got, I chose to feed my hope.”
  • She recognizes that you have to build muscles of integrity and waiting. “You can’t build muscle without pushback and rest.”
  • We share how we both spent time journaling and writing to our future husbands.

Jessica reflects Heaven to me and I just feel brighter after talking with her. I hope you feel the same way. You can keep up with Jessica on Instagram at @jessicashakirbeauty and at her websites: and

Hey, single ladies— are you frustrated by the dating world? This episode is brought to you by my free guide called “6 Tips to Activate Your Dating Life with Intention and Clarity.” These resources helped propel me from sitting on the couch to out on a date. Head over to to check it out! With you on the journey.